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I feel my heart beating slowly after six hours of struggling to breathe under his weight
Wooden floorboards drier than a sidewalk on a summer’s afternoon
Tiny splinters poking straight up seem like nails
There in the corner lay my virginity, too scared to talk and blind
Chains clasped tightly around those small wrists
His back facing daddy with bloody lashes
The heat can get to him sometimes, making the boiling water burn the flesh
He screams so loud food is shoved into his mouth to keep him quiet
Suppertime is the worst for the leering giant stands in the doorway with his unwashed knife
I huddle quietly in the corner shaking till my nails crack from chewing on them
No!!! I don’t want to feel anymore!
Stop it! Please don’t hurt me!!!
I can feel what was once mine: a blissful child
Now, I am confused and afraid of what my reality is now
He comes…he comes closer with those muddy, leather boots
A black shroud covers my whole body as hands squeeze the thighs
I sob for what seems like hours, releasing tears of squashed cries
Death did it again yet my voice is too small to hear
Too much power he contains in his oily hands
Those hungry dogs that won’t let go of my swollen arms
If I say “No” he rapes me as if I were a virgin
If I cry he belts my chest for hours
The room is too far from the orphanage
Deer sometimes peer into the house and smell my anxious sweat
It does not bother them at all
They wait for the little boy to be slaughtered for dinnertime
I am a meal to be butchered like a pig
Entrails served on a plate for animals who once ate plants